Friday, August 12, 2005

Friday Meditation

I got up this morning, with no real plan in mind. Peter was off at work and I know that Friday is cleaning day so I had my cup of coffee and set out on my day. I spent the day thinking about the last "discussion" with some bloggers of whom I was a reader.

And I talked to God as I went about doing the laundry and I asked him, "God, was there anything in what I have written in the last few weeks that was wrong?" I mean, "Do I share a message of inclusion and compassion?" "Have I said anything that goes against the true meaning of being a christian?" I let those questions hang in the air between us all day. And I waited.

There was no lightning bolt, no long distance phone call, no revelatory visions of angels and the choirs of heaven, it was peaceful all day. The only thing I heard come back was the voice in my soul.

And it said to me " You know jeremy, you do your best, you share the truth and you do no harm. There are many people on earth who would seem to have God's ear, but they do not. The difference between you and them is this; You believe in God and his love and his forgiveness. You do not mince words when you talk about God, your faith is what sets you apart from the rest. And Maybe some people may not have had the "god experience" you have, and that is where you have to live and let live. I agreed with him.

You might be struggling to find your footing in your christian journey, and that is ok, what I do have to say is this, if your God voice or whoever's god voice you listen to, if it is judgemental or exclusionary or sets down rules for acceptance into God's kingdom, then you might want to reconsider who you are listening to.

Last night I was watching my favorite TV show, "Touched by an Angel." It was a cross over episode with the family from another series, the name escapes me right now, anyway it was the one about the alcoholic woman and her hunt to get Joe Green. And Dinah and her mother were visiting with the girl on Death Row. Anyways, I digress.

The point of this story is, "the woman was on a run to find a drink, and she broke into her office where she has stashed a bottle." And Tess appears and speaks to her. And she said, "God loves you, He created you, and he counts every hair on your head, and he sees everything that you do and he knows every lie that you tell, BUT you know the good thing, God forgives you." If you want to stop the drinking and the lying then you need to find God, because he can help you.

For many years since my diagnosis many years ago, TBAA was a show that moved me to tears on every episode, for One sentance " I am an angel, sent by God, to tell you that HE loves you and has a message for you..." I believed that line, and I always have. It kept me alive one day at a time and it still does. So when you put barriers on Gods love and acceptance and forgiveness, then I have to vehemently DISAGREE with you.

God loves every man, woman and child he has created. And God did not create Illness and Suffering. But he does offer you a route away from the suffering if you turn your face to him and you pray and you know that God holds you in the palm of his hand. Yes, disease and illness makes us question where God is when it hurts and why God did this to us?

All I can say is, if you have the faith of a mustard seed, then you will get through this. IN any case, sometimes we get sick and end up in the dark, and then we come through it and we come into the "light." And in some cases we come into "Light Itself."

I have never shared anything about God that I did not "come to believe." And I spent the day quietly meditating on God and his voice, and I listened to the sounds around me all day, for the tv was off and it was just me and the silence of my day. It was wonderful. I felt like I had connected with the peace that i so often miss during my day.

So many questions are being asked in the world, this group is calling for americans to "vote christian" who the fuck gives jerry falwell the right to call the nation to "vote christian" what the hell is that? Does he realize how demoralizing that is to those of us who may follow God but not follow certain christian movements? What about all the people who are not "christian" like the jewish, muslim, protestant, and others who do not identify as "christian" and those of us who believe that some of these "christians" are just FULL OF SHIT !!! All of these preachermen WILL eventually answer to Almighty God for their lives, actions and words.

Let's further divide the populations. The muslim population is now living in fear that they will be racially profiled and harmed, the others who see racial and ethnic lines are not communicating and divisions exists in a country that is supposed to be united but "is not!"

God weeps at all this insanity and division and those who seem to think personally that God has passed judgement openly about certain people and certain issues. I do not agree with any christian who tells me anything except the fact the God loves us, knows us, feels for us and prays and forgives us.

Such a simple message, why can't we agree on this message instead of making life so hard for so many people to live good and proper life, whether you are gay or straight, black, white, christain, muslim, jewish, protestant etc... the list goes on and on.

I think God weeps at what has happened to the earth he created !!!


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